Behold Thyself

As I travel through the shadow lands
I falter and fail, but alas
It is allowed to show me my frailty.
And in humiliation I call out
To the only One who knows me, crying,
Change my heart, Righteous God!
For I know what I am.
But the time is not yet fulfilled
Good measure has not been pressed down,
And I turn from the mirror
And forget my shape.

Peace

There is a place
Where one can sing out with their whole soul
And still have breath enough to laugh with the innocent mountains
That slowly descend into fertile fields of wheat and barley.
Where every walk is a dance carried by the wind
Away from the shackles of time
Into the not so distant, but ever-eluding now,
Where eternity rests in peace
And beckons softly in the hearts of the homesick

Beckoning

The night wind soothes and calls
My name is forgotten
My dreams are fulfilled
As the ocean whispers secrets
Of endless Ages

Life gently pursuades me
And I reluctantly submit
Grudgingly, not lovingly yet
I progress

The sun shines now and
I am embraced
The wind cools my flesh
And I wonder
That I seldom truly see

Passion

The passion I see in You
Begins to melt the chains that bind my soul.
Your love is a raging river
And a warm blanket

The wind cools my face, flustered with fear
And dread of misconstrued meanings
I have made it to the mountain top.

You lift me to a place I've never been
Through the depths of black
And pains of blue
You've carried me when I could walk no more
I've fainted and fallen and cried out in anguish
That would not subside
You carried me through.

You stand High and Exalted
In the Beautiful Gates
Yet you stoop to mend my broken wings
The pain is worth your touch.
I'm so in love with You.

Freedom

I am a spirit
Trapped in a flesh gone mad
With delusions and illusions
Of selfish freedom
Until I am liberated
I will fight the chains
My spirit belongs
To the One who breathed it
But my soul is of the dust
From whence it came
There is purity within me
But not of me, my flesh
That corrupted and clamoring
Vile beast that I was.
While the flesh rules
There is oppression in every direction
But oppresion is the mother of Revolution.
A struggle to the death
Is fought within my borders
But the Spirit is bound to prevail
And freedom will rise up
And eminate through my being
Until the essence of me is you.

Free Thinkers

The way I see it, you have two types of "free-thinkers," one wants to be seen as free-thinking, and one truly thinks for himself. The former tends to oppose some widely held belief, simply for the sake of opposing it, with no proof, and often no rational basis whatsoever for his opposition, and because he is now part of a small sect of people who oppose this belief, he may now consider himself a "free-thinker," and proceed to convert as many people as possible to his "free" way of thinking. Also he is now required by the rules of free-thinking imposters everywhere to carry about him an air of sophistication and scorn, scoffing at everyone who holds to a belief that might be called, God-forbid, "traditional."

It seems to me that the individuals that disbelieve in whatever I may believe in have an easy out and a very manipulative way to silence those of us who would defend our beliefs, simply by saying, "oh, I guess you're not a free-thinker." I don't think that's fair play. I think that the one who is in the world and who is inundated with slanted advertisements, biased news reports, agenda-led comedies and dramas on television and especially movies, but who chooses not to believe what is fed to him is the true "free-thinker." This one, I believe is the one who truly thinks for himself.

I used to be enamored with this idea of free-thinking, wondering how in the world I could get into this secret club. But I believe I've found out how. It's simple, you only have to stop believing in the truth, stop seeking the truth, and in the end, become an enemy of the truth, and you're in! It's just that simple.

Don't be blinded by the show of sophistication or misled by the act. Look at the fruit of the life. See past the smoke and mirrors. There are many "lions in sheep's clothing," seeking to devour those who stumble weary into their paths. We must know what we believe and why we believe, because these that I speak of know what they believe and they are eager for the chance to ridicule you for your beliefs, and to tell you every reason why you're a simpleton and an idiot to believe what you do.

But be warned, there is no talking to any of these supposed free-thinkers in any logical, reasonable way. They simply will not hear you. They only have the ability to spit out opinion as fact, they do not have the capacity to receive instruction or to consider an opinion other than their own, because in their "free-thinking," they have not made room for actual real-thinking.

What Are You Buying?

A traveling salesman comes into your home showing you his newest vacuum model, demonstrating all the impressive and convenient functions, and you take it because it works—you've seen it with your own eyes. A week or a month later your vacuum is broken and the salesman's long gone and you're out 200 bucks.

A traveling salesman comes into your home more often than you think, selling his wares, yet his offerings aren't vacuums, but values. He shows you how good they work in whatever time you give him. He can sell you casual sex in thirty minutes. He can sell you a happy homosexual life in under two hours. He can sell you a guiltless affair, a painless divorce, and a happy marriage to the much, much younger girl of your dreams-all in the span of one evening. He sells you bling up to your eyeballs with promises that it will bring you security; he sells you drugs for a thrill that ends up in a glamorous rehab center for celebrities; he sells you an ideal man who always says the right thing for the right reason, and he sells you perfect people in perfect situations, promising that you can be just like them for a small fee. You take it because it works. You've seen it with your own eyes.

Two months later, or a year, or a decade, you find out that what you bought does not do all that this salesman promised. Somehow you can't maintain the happiness, or the thrill, or the glamour, and somehow it's your fault because you've seen it work and without realizing it, you bought it—you believed it. But you're not out 200 bucks. Much more is the price you pay in the end. You carry scars from broken marriages, chains of overpowering addictions, sleepless hours filled up with envy or violence or regret. And the salesman's long gone. He could never give you your years back anyway.

Next time you turn on your TV to your favorite show, or you watch the next blockbuster that everyone's talking about, ask yourself, "What am I buying?" The business is values. When you're caught in a dilemma, and you've got to make a choice, notice in your mind to whom to what you turn for answers. What have you bought already?

Yesterday, Today and Forever

God never changes! There is no shadow of turning with the Lord. Do you know what this means? It means that His love never changes, for God is Love. The love that He offers you will never be retracted-God will never repent of the Love that He gives. It has been said that God exudes love just as the sun exudes light and heat. He loves because it is His nature to love, and not because the objects of His love are worthy. But His love makes us worthy! That is what the Good News is all about. The love of God in Christ makes us what we have no power to become on our own. "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever should believe in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For the Son did not come into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved." (John 3:16-17) If we are honest with ourselves and before God, we must confess that we are sinners by nature; that no matter how hard we try to be good, we always fall short. But this does not negate the Love of Christ. Christ loved us while we were yet sinners. In other words, Christ loved us while we were yet unloveable, while we were blind even to the fact that we needed Him, while we were truly dead in our trespasses and sins, and if Christ loved us when we were in that state of blindness and callous sin, what could now tear us from His hand? Nothing. Not life, nor death, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers--nothing. Christ prayed to the Father, "of those whom You have given me, I have lost not one." Surely this gives us great cause to rejoice, for the love of God changes us from sinner to saint, from outcast to brother, from slave to free, from death to life. It is the love of Christ first and foremost that compels us towards repentance (change) and every good thing. Notice that it is not our love for Christ that changes us, but Christ's love for us. Christ sees immense value in us, and through His love, that value becomes a reality in our lives.
In this world there are forces at work against those who would respond to the love of God; very real forces that attack the bedrock of our faith. The main hinderance to love is fear, and fear is everywhere you look in the world. Fear of disease, fear of flood, fear of economic collapse, fear of violence, fear of man. Through the violence we witness on TV, in the news, in movies, in music, we become defensive people, always on the alert and suspicious of all men, thus hindering the progress of love in our hearts. For love and fear cannot coexist. The world bombards our minds with real or percieved threats to our very false sense of security. With forboding tones regarding an outbreak of e.coli that could spread to the entire nation, the anchorman warns us that our very food could be unsafe; with scientific religious ferver they warn us of the collapse of the sky due to global warming; and every day there is a new disease which threatens you and your children, but coincidentally there is also a new drug to treat it! We live in a world of fear. Why? Because a people that live in fear is a people under control. Who is behind all this? The father of lies. He is the source of all that would keep us from the freedom that is ours in Christ. Christ is the One who said, "You shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free." So wherever you are in your walk with God, choose this day to break free from fear. The bible says 365 times, "fear not." That's once for every day of the year. Is that a coincidence? So begin today to walk in the liberation of Christ's love for you. Meditate on it, think about it and believe it, to the exclusion of everything that contradicts or hinders it. Blessings to you.

What?

Hey man, what's on my mind is that I need to grow up, need to stop worrying about gettin paid, take my mind off my money and my money off my mind, need to stop talkin so much, talkin so much jive, and you dig, you know. everywhere i look is jive. I look up, look down, look left and right, i find even inside the only one i know, jive. somewhere i got my lines crossed, somewhere i got my soul tied up, somewhere i got hungry for some food i ain't had yet, somewhere i got born again, and somewhere i died. now i see it, i smell it, i wade around in the deep cespool of used up lies and alibis, lookin for the way back, lookin for the way out, lookin for the bridge across my troubled water. but i be distracted, contracted, and reinacted on the big screen, in a movie scene which i seen a hundred times, yet i go back to the theatre and sit again in the sweat stained easy rider, feet stuck fast by chewed bubble gum and melted skittles, fillin my nose with marmelade dreams and pirate ship schemes, gonna make it to the top of that ladder man, gonna make it as soon as the movie ends. but the movie never ends, it plays on an endless reel, slowly turning the days of my life across the false flourescent light flashing through every frame titled self, me, and I. and i laugh in my sleep because i know that if it wern't for the man who talked no jive, knew no jive and took no jive, this poor sap would wake up soon to find himself in the windswept parking lot of the torn down theatre which the jackals haunt, unable to cry for help for his throat has been dried for centuries and unable to move cause he has no strength left in his bones, and unable to sleep ever again for fear of the firestorm forcasted at one hundred percent.

Mr. Governor

A few weeks ago I heard that my neighbor Mr. Governor was put into a nursing home. I immediately sensed the need to go and see him. I am not particularly close to him and even more distant from his wife, but the urging was strong enough that I could not ignore it. Intending to go and see him, I asked another neighbor where he was staying and he told me, but added that Mr. Governor did not want any visitors. Still, I told myself, I will go and see him. Mr. Governor died Thursday. I never got over there. Constantly I was reminded that I needed to go see him and constantly I said I would, but put it off. I don’t know the state of his soul was when he died, or what I could have done if I had gone, but one thing I know for sure is that now I’ll never know. I’m filled with a deep sense of shame and sadness that I was called to visit this man before his death and I did not respond. Please listen carefuly and obey all that the Lord asks of you, for only He knows the future and your place in it. If you know of something(s) that you need to do, do it today. Say it today. Give it today. Send it today. Visit today. "Today, if you hear His voice..."

Why We Left

The hole in the soul that never quite gets filled is what drives us. The sound of a tinkling bell from a distant land is what calls us. We search and search under every rock and behind every tree, looking for the final thing. That which would satisfy forever and end our wandering and pandering. We are beggars and homeless, listless in gehenna until we hear that small voice say to us, "you have a home here. Come, then." And so we come, not knowing where we go, seeking daily our steps, over mountains and plains, valleys and still waters, no place to dwell on this earth, no place where we are completely at ease. We search because we cannot do otherwise. In mercy we have been shown a better way, a better place; and in bitterness we leave this world behind, clenching every grain of sand as it slips through our fingertips, until destitute and empty, we raise our empty hands and say, "I am free to find." And find we will. This is our hope and our calling. Wonderful wanderers.

Introducing Myself

My name is Dallas. Here I hope to present my thoughts--here in a space that is dedicated to millions of thoughts. I am a Christian, as hopefully you will see, though I do not wish to spoon feed anyone, as I do not wish to be spoon fed. And though there is a time for being fed in this way, as with the newborn or the sick or the feeble (I have been all three), I do not seek here to present my findings in that manner. Rather, I would like to present ideas just as I have been presented with them, through the four gates of desire, joy, fear, and sadness.*
I could here attempt to define myself by way of introduction, but as soon as I do, I will be changed from that definition by degree, and days or years later, as I read this post again, I will be embarrassed at the outdated facsimile of myself. The only unchanging aspect of my nature I have already noted.
If you care to, please come with me through life, and ponder my thoughts. Disagree with me, if you will, but state your case plainly and logically. Perhaps I am wrong about some things. Perhaps many. Wisdom is what I seek, for the "fool despises wisdom and instruction" (Proverbs 1:7), so I will not be hurt if you counter my arguments.
Aside from the arguments themselves, if you are inclined, critique the writing, for writing is a craft and a practice. I hope to build relationships with other like-minded people in this way, thus improving and sharpening our skills together. This is a great opportunity for growth in many areas of life, both for the reader and the writer, and I hope that you will be blessed and challenged by what you read here.

*These are the four basic emotions presented by St. Augustine in Confessions, p.
267.